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Yaz's avatar

Whew, NEEDED to hear this! A huge part of this mindset for me is being placed in a caretaker role especially as the eldest daughter. I want my work and legacy to help people and be the antithesis of capitalism and grind culture, but felt (and still feel at times) that the people I want to work with won’t be able to afford what I ask for, despite going above and beyond, but the ones that can afford what I would like to charge, just…aren’t aligned in my values. It’s something I still wrestle with and part of the reason I haven’t put together a service list as part of my website/portfolio, but is what’s holding me back. I don’t want to be a martyr anymore, I’m better for my communities when I’m able to take care of myself, live, and go through constant burn out. Thank you for this reminder 💝

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Shaneh Woods's avatar

I feel this so deeply. That eldest daughter, caretaker energy runs deep—and unlearning martyrdom is real work. I'm sure there is also some generational trauma being healed too.

You’re absolutely right: you're better for your communities when you’re well. When you're resourced, rested, and rooted.

You're not behind. You're becoming. And I’m so glad this landed when you needed it. 💛

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Yaz's avatar

Exactly, yes! So much generational trauma that I’m still working through and all of it is exhausting work, but worth it for me. But again, thank you for reframing what I can and am supposed to do and that taking care of myself isn’t selfish, it’s necessary.

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